??Confused??

Most have asked us whats next?? Well, we are not sure and we don't even have that answer yet. I had a consultation with Dr. Malo about 2.5 weeks ago and asked the same thing "whats next?". He gave me three options:

1. Continue with injections and IUIs for a couple of more cycles
2. Go through a procedure/surgery called Ovarian Drilling
3. Invitro Fertilization

Eli and I talked and decided we are done with injections and IUIs. We did 7 cycles and although they were not all "good" cycles with "good" chances for a pregnancy we emotionally have gone through 7 cycles and that is enough.

Do we do ovarian drilling?? Its a surgery that involves a laser or cautery that makes holes into the ovaries to drain some of the cysts. Its practiced all the time in Europe and about 80% of the time it works, making you "Suzy Q regular" with regular periods, cycles and ovulation. And the other 20% of the time it does nothing and you waste your time on surgery that could potentially not work. It can also form scar tissue on the ovaries, adding another thing to the "list" of what is hindering my fertility. It would be good if it worked, but what if it didn't??

Then there is IVF, which costs A LOT of money, but is almost guaranteed to work and give us a baby.

We have a lot to decide on and we aren't really in any hurry. We are both enjoying this "break" and time with each other. For the last two years, the first 2 years of our marriage, we have been consumed with trying to have a baby. We haven't had time for each other or time to "be married". We had originally thought we would do IVF this August but now not so sure. Eli is having a hard time with spending the money and doesn't want to do it. Its not just the money but many other things as well. He says he misses his wife, the one he married. He misses having fun with me and not worrying month to month if we are pregnant or not. He misses me and wants me back. He knows how bad I want a baby and is willing to do IVF someday. I want us both to be ready and both feel its the right thing. He knows I will do it and is okay with that. Right now we can't put a date on it or a time limit. We need to concentrate on our marriage and mend the broken things that have happened already going through this difficult journey. Please continue to pray for us as we struggle through this thing called LIFE....

Love, Kristen & Eli

Stress Free

Things have been going well. This break has been good for me mentally and physically. I have lost over 10 lbs and have been a lot less stressful which feels like 50 lbs!! Eli and I have been staying pretty busy. He went to Wyoming for a week recently and I will be leaving next week for Florida. Its nice to be able to do what we want and go where we want, not having to worry about when we need to be home or at the doctor's office. During infertility treatments you feel like you have no control over your life. Having control back has been great! I will be going to Florida with my family; mom, grandma and aunt. We went last year and had an amazing time. I cherish every moment I get to spend with family, they mean the world to me. Last year I was on a 2 week wait and doing suppositories twice a day so I wasn't really able to relax. This year I WILL be relaxing and enjoying myself and I will even be able to have a few drinks this time around :)
I still haven't gotten a period yet so Dr. Malo does want me to take Provera to bring one on. He said it was important that I take Provera every 30-40 days to get a period. Waiting too long isn't healthy. I was in on Friday for a diagnostic ultrasound because I have been having left sided ovarian pain. The ultrasound showed a fluid filled cyst on my left tube. They ruled out a tubal pregnancy and took other blood work. Things seem to be okay, but they will check again after I get a period to see if it has resolved on its own.
As far as future plans....we really don't have any right now. I hope to be doing IVF by Fall but life and fertility are hard to plan, so we will see what happens. Right now we are focusing on each other and taking one day at a time! Keep praying for us!

Love, Kristen & Eli

New Year, New Me!

Happy New Year!! We have been so busy with all of the holidays I haven't had time to update my blog. Although we are not actively doing fertility treatments I would like to still update my blog on our family and life!
After our last fertility treatment the nurse instructed me to take Provera to get a period as soon as possible, not to have sex because of the possibility of getting pregnant on my own with that many eggs. Well, being the compliant patient that I am I didn't take the Provera right away....however we did not get pregnant. But one amazing thing happened, I GOT MY PERIOD ON MY OWN. Not with any medications, not after and ovulation induction, simply on my own. I have NEVER in my life gotten a period on my own. Hopefully, it will continue. I have started keeping track of my cycles to see what my body does on its own. Maybe the Metformin is starting to work ??? Whatever it is I hope it continues. This whole taking a break thing hasn't been so bad. I am actually liking it. Not having to go to the doctor, worry about taking an injection everyday, worrying and stressing if this month will be our month and I have felt "lighter" and more stress free lately. Although, I still do have my moments. The last one being yesterday at my mom's for New Years...to many pregnant people talking about their pregnancy....even though I am so so happy for them, its just plain hard listening to it when you want to be in their shoes so badly. No one would understand unless they have gone through it.
We hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and wish everyone good health and happiness in 2010!!

Love, Kristen & Eli

Update

Things are working! Thank god! My estrogen level was over 500 yesterday and I have 2 follicles growing at the same rate. Now if only we can get them to continue to grow at the same rate and mature together! The estrogen level is what I am so excited about. Even though the follicles only measured around 11.0 the estrogen level tells us that they, or one, are going to continue to grow. Sometimes you see the results in the estrogen before you see the growth in the follicle(s). I am back down to taking 112.5 of Menopur and go back for another ultrasound on Saturday morning in Minneapolis. I am hoping things will be ready by Monday and we will be doing IUI Monday or Tuesday. Please continue to pray that things keep growing and keep us in your hearts as this will be our last round of injections and IUIs. Thank you.

Love, Kristen & Eli

Follicle Study #3

Things are still going VERY slow. My estrogen level today was 89. Glad it is still rising and not falling. There were multiple small follicles again, but none have grown since last time. Today Dr. Malo increased my dose from 112.5 to 150. Hopefully that will help! My next appointment is Thursday, pray there is change!

Love, Kristen & Eli

Follicle Study 2

My second follicle study was changed to today instead of Saturday. I was hoping for some good change, but there wasn't really any change. Multiple small follicles still and none that have started to "take off". I am to continue with my same medication dosages and have my next study on Monday. Hopefully by then there will be some change. It seems like things are going slower this time. However, I should know by now that my body reacts different every cycle even if its the same medication. Pray for change on Monday and continue to pray to god and let him know its okay now to give us our miracle, we are waiting and more then ready!

Kristen & Eli

Follicle Study 1

I had my first follicle study for this cycle on Tuesday. There wasn't much change, not much growing, just multiple small follicles. Dr. Malo increased my medication and I will now be taking 112.5mg instead of 75mg of Menopur a day. Hopefully that will stimulate some more growth. My next follicle study is Saturday. Please say an extra prayer for us this cylce as it will be our last cylce of injections.

Love, Kristen & Eli